Monday, April 6, 2009

Manic Monday

How often do you change your toothbrush?

I don't know! Never really thought of least every two months I guess. Or around there...I can't stand when the bristles start to go wonky.

What is your favorite item of clothing to shop for?

If you're really going to make me pick just one item, it's going to have to be underwear! LOVE shopping for the under garments. They're all just so cute, and fun!

Do you use social media (Twitter, Facebook, etc.)? Which do you use most often?

Facebook would be what I use most often...although, I don't log on half as much as I used to. Just joined Twitter, haven't really caught on to what all the hype is about...but it keeps me occupied during slow points at work!

Monday, March 23, 2009

Manic Monday!

Do you screen your phone calls?

All the time!! It may seem rude, maybe even detached...but I'm not a big phone-talker. I much prefer text messaging, and e-mails! Avoids all awkward silences, as well as the possibility of getting into a conversation that I do not want to be a part of. Usually though, I only screen numbers I don't recognize, or people I don't talk to on a regular basis. If it's important, they'll leave a voicemail!

When was the last time you lost your temper?

Now, this depends on how you define 'temper'. I tend to lose my temper quite easily - I am a redhead afterall! Losing my temper can come in different levels though...I can get ticked off or annoyed, which the last time that happened would have been Friday night, and it puts me in a foul mood where I can be quite the miserable bitch! Or, I can throw an absolute fit - consisting of screaming, sometimes tears, and pretty much every curse word you can think of - but it usually takes a lot to get me to that point. Thankfully, this hasn't happened in while (which I'm sure anyone close to me is relieved by).

When you're lost, do you ask for directions?

I am constantly getting lost - I have even been known to get lost driving home from my own cottage!! Sad, but, yes, I am always asking for directions. Mainly, from my Dad, who is my own, live, GPS system!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Manic Monday

Are you a saver or spender?
I am definitely a spender. As I am writing this, I am already planning what I am going to buy with my paycheck this week. I am trying to be a saver though. I opened a savings account, and will transfer whatever extra I can to start building it up...even it's only a couple of dollars. I'm learning.

Do you prefer to walk around barefoot in your home? Socks? Shoes?
I prefer to be barefoot 24/7. If it were possible, not only would I be barefoot in my home, but I would be barefoot outside, in my car, in the grocery store - EVERYWHERE! Thankfully, I own flip flops in every possible colour, which allows me to be as close to barefoot as possible!

Do you talk to yourself?
All the time. Sometimes, I talk to myself in french too. There are one million and one thoughts flying through my mind everyday. Talking to myself calms me down, helps me think clearly, helps me make decisions. If sometimes, it happens to be in french, it's just because I'm fancy like that!!

Monday, March 9, 2009

Manic Monday

What would you do with an extra hour each day?

My first reaction is to say I would sleep...but that seems like a waste of an extra hour. Instead, I would try to spend it with friends, or family. I am truly happy when surrounded by the people I care about, and I think that that would be a better use of extra time!

Do you wear a watch? If so, tell us about it. If not, how do you keep track of time?

I haven't worn a watch since I was eleven, or twelve years old..and it was a purple, digital Timex. Now, I either use my desktop at work, clock-radio in the car, or my cell phone to remind me of the time.

If it was possible, would you want to know how many days you had left to live?

Absolutely not!! For me, I think that would be too depressing. I would much rather enjoy my time, dreaming of what's to come next, instead of knowing I was on the clock to live my life.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Manic Monday

I had such a good weekend...I don't even mind being back to work this Monday morning!!

If I was a car, I'd be:
A bright red Nissan Versa, obviously!! Dependable, sporty and cute!

If I was a drink, I'd be:
Something tasty, and fruity with a slight kick to it - like a rasberry martini. ;)

If I was emotion, I'd be:
Contentment - to be satisfied with what I have, or not want more, or anything else.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

I had decided it would be over. I could control myself, and we could just be friends. He has a family, after all. What was I thinking?? It wasn't that my conscience had caught up with me - I muted that a long time ago. The chemistry was too strong, and he's a charmer. True - I started this whole mess, with what had been intended as innocent flirting. But, then again, is any flirtation really innocent? Regardless, it was time to cut the strings. No more funny business. No more almost affair - after all, you can't have an affair if you don't have feelings...and even if you do have those feelings, ignoring them pretty much means they don't exist. Besides, after two dates and more text messages than I can count, I am really starting to like Nick. None of this is fair to him.
Snuggled down for the night, after a great date with Nick, I tuned in to the semi-good finale of Late Night with Conan O'Brien. My phone lit up, stating one new message had arrived. It was him - not Nick. Okay, no problem. A few quick texts back and forth, and I'll say good night.
Okay, so more than a few texts later, and we're talking on the phone. For some reason, he is the only person I don't mind talking on the phone with....I wonder why that is...not important right now. I am exhausted, and at the point of wondering what I am still on the phone. Then, he starts. Like a snake charmer playing his flute, he speaks using soft words and sweet sayings, hypnotizing me. I forget about my earlier declaration and fall. It's 4:30am, and I am in my car, driving to his house, because he really, really wants to see me. On the way over, reality sets in and brings me out of the daze - What am I doing?? The thought is barely out of my head when my phone rings - he's wondering where I am; he needs to see me.
Battling to keep the door firmly shut on my own feelings, I pull up to his house but refuse to go in. Instead, I suggest we go for a drive. Too many lures are inside that house. We drive for an hour, and when I start to head back, he asks me to stop the car. Knowing nothing good would come of this, I stopped the car, turned off the ignition. Adjusting in my seat to face him, he looks straight ahead and blurts out he has feelings for me. Feelings he doesn't know what to do with, because he knows we should just be friends. Not knowing what else to say, I hold on to the second part of his statement, and start to reassure him we are just friends, and all the...physical interaction...will stop. I look away, close my eyes and silently will myself to believe what I am saying. Everything is harder when he is right there..when I can so easily touch him. Control yourself!! I open my eyes and look at him. His face is right there, and without a chance to think, he is kissing me like his sole purpose is to kiss me. Never, have I ever, been kisses like that before. Yikes, I am in trouble here...we are in trouble here. The kissing continued, for how long I couldn't say, and I didn't care. I didn't want it to stop. We didn't move past the kissing, and once it did stop, I started the car and headed back towards his house without saying anything. We were uncharacteristically quite the ride home, and when he got out of the car, I wanted to follow, but stayed, buckled in for more reasons than safety.
I drove back to my house, thinking of him, thinking of Nick. What the hell was going on in my head? I didn't even want to start trying to figure out my heart. Arriving at home, I got back in to bed and tried to sleep. Restless, I lay there trying not to think. My phone lit up - he was calling me. Battling against better judgement, I answered and we talked until the sun came up - 7:30am. Nothing in particular was brought up. There was no more talk of feelings, or anything intense. Just chit chat. Hanging up the phone, for some reason, felt somewhat of a closed chapter with him. I couldn't put my finger on it, but I knew something change.
I woke up on Saturday with an unexplainable urge to talk to Nick. Up until now, I hadn't figured out my feelings for him, but they pointed clear now. I am in like, and do not want to ruin this for anything. As I got ready to go out with friends, I closed the door, locked the latch and tucked away the key to my feelings for him.
My new feelings, for the new guy are meant for a clean, new start. I am going to put everything I've got in to making this work.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Manic Monday

What's one of the simple pleasures in your life?
The relationship I share with my Mum. She is such a wonderful person, and supports me regardless of what decisions I make...good or bad. She will always offer her opinion, of course, but understands that I am my own person and respects my need to do things my own way. I share anything and everything with her. I would be lost without my mum. She is my best friend, and not a lot of people can say that about one of their parents. I am thankful everyday to have her.

What do you like to snack on when you watch a movie?
Movies watched at home are accompanied by any snack I'm craving at the could be anything from a peanut butter & honey sandwhich to cheese & crackers. If I'm at the theater, popcorn is a definite must - with butter, not Becel..ick - and Milkduds. I can never remember which movie I saw it in, but the character added Milkduds to her popcorn..I tried it, and it's amazing!!! Buttery, chocolatey, crunchy and chewy! Savory and's the best snack!! Seriously...try it!!

If you were a Survivor contestant, what would be your luxury item?
Ha ha...I would so fail on Survivor...but, if I were to be a contestant, my cell phone would be the first choice, but the chances of having an reception are unlikely. So, I would probably bring my iPod. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't listen to music - I think I would go through withdrawals without my music.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Friday Fill-Ins

1. Give me a chance and I'll do my best not to let you down.

2. Whenever there is something plaguing my mind, I retract from the world and hide in my bed.

3. I wish you weren't stuck in my head - I wish I could just say good-bye.

4. Tuesday's dinner - Salmon kabobs with wild rice and peppers - was the last thing I ate that was utterly delicious.

5. To live in this world, is a constant battle between 'good' and 'bad'.

6. Other than this one, Charlene's is the last blog I commented on.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to date number two with Nick, tomorrow my plans include (hopefully) sleeping in and a friends birthday dinner and Sunday I plan to study, and go to the gym.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Manic Monday

I love finding cute writing prompts - I feel better writing how I'm feeling or what has been going on in my life, but don't always know how to put it into words. The writing prompts open the window, either getting my creative juices flowing for a seperate post, just giving me the opening I had been searching for to express myself without rambling.

What is your favorite candy?
I'm a fan of chocolate - who isn't, really? - but my absolute favorite candy are Sour Cherry Blasters. My fabulous cousin brough them to me when I was 7 years old, in the hospital with a severly broken arm. I have loved them ever since. Yum!

Name one thing that you'd want to receive as a gift for Valentine's day.
Valentine's day, I find, is the hardest "holiday" to shop for. If I had to choose an ideal gift, I think I would request a letter written by my significant other. I'm not big on mushy gushy stuff, but a letter explaining why me would be very special. Flowers never hurt either.

Can we truly love someone who loves another?
Absolutely. True love is to love someone for who they are, not how they feel for your, or for another. If they are flawed in not returning your love, you still love them despite it.
Where there is true love, there will always be pain.

He would not stay for me, and who can wonder?
He would not stay for me to stand and gaze.
I shook his hand and tore my heart in sunder
And went with half my life about my ways.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

A track out of my lifes soundtrack...

I cannot live without music. I simply can't function without it. My iPod travels everywhere with me, and there are always CD's packed into my car - which makes me very thankful for my new, 6 CD changer! - Some days, I am happy with whatever is playing on the radio. Other days - like today - a mood will strike I will aboslutely have to listen to a particular song, or artist, at full, speaker thumping, ear blasting volume. Today, it was Billy Joel. How I love Billy Joel. Piano Man will forever be my favourite song by this artist, but this morning as I drove to the subway station, another one of his songs connected with me. I can't explain why - not yet at least - but it just made so much sense, and helped me carry a smile all the way into work.

You May be Right

Friday night I crashed your party
Saturday I said I'm sorry
Sunday came and trashed me out again
I was only having fun
Wasn't hurting anyone
And we all enjoyed the weekend for a change

I've been stranded in the combat zone
I walked through Bedford Stuy alone
Even rode my motorcycle in the rain
And you told me not to drive
But I made it home alive
So you said that only proves that I'm insane

You may be right
I may be crazy
But it just might be a lunatic you're looking for
Turn out the light
Don't try to save me
You may be wrong for all I know
But you may be right

Remember how I found you there
Alone in your electric chair
I told you dirty jokes until you smiled
You were lonely for a man
I said take me as I am
'Cause you might enjoy some madness for awhile

Now think of all the years you tried to
Find someone to satisfy you
I might be as crazy as you say
If I'm crazy then it's true
That it's all because of you
And you wouldn't want me any other way

You may be right
I may be crazy
But it just may be a lunatic you're looking for
It's too late to fight
It's too late to change me
You may be wrong for all I know
But you may be right

You may be right
I may be crazy
But it just might be a lunatic you're looking for
Turn out the light
Don't try to save me
You may be wrong for all I know
But you may be right

You may be wrong, but you may be right
You may be wrong, but you may be right

If you haven't heard this song before, download it - buy the cd - just listen! It's a classic, amongst many others, by Billy Joel.

Friday, January 23, 2009

Friday Fill-ins

Stolen! :) Happy Friday!

1. Oh, I am so excited!! And..little bits nervous.
2. Lately, life is full of changes, big and little.
3. During the week, I am known as 'Serious Sarah'.
4. Someone actually shouted out "Do fries come with that shake" to me today; are you kidding me???
5. Right now I'd like to be on my way home for the weekend.
6. My iPod is my favorite gadget.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to going out with some great friends, tomorrow my plans include making homemade Chinese food and going on a 'date' and Sunday, I'm making coconut cream tarts for my mummy's birthday!!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Never saw it coming...

The weekend is upon us!

Twenty-four hours ago, I had absolutely no plans for the weekend...Aside from having my aunt and uncle on Saturday and making Chinese food - yes, I said making..not ordering - I had a fairly relaxed couple of days on the horizon. Normally, when looking forward to a quite break from the work week, I will do everything in my power to keep it so, but..

I have a date! :) Sort of. Well, I think it's a date. To tell you the truth, I haven't been on a "date" since high school, so I really have no clue what a date consists of these days. Let me break it down...I met this guy through the boyfriend of my best friend. Luckily her boyfriend is one of my good friends, and I get along with the majority of his friends as well. This is the third one of his friends that he has tried to set me up with...

The first, was fun for a month during the summer, but we just didn't click We ended up to be friends in the end, which is great!

The second - we danced together once, where he smelt my hair and after asking what shampoo I used, decided it was o.k. to share that he was a user of Head and Shoulders. Cue to exit.

So, now we are on to bachelor number three. When originally introduced to him, it was just as friends, and I had never given him much thought. In a group, we went to bars together, out for wings and beer, out for dinner. New Years rolled around, and it ended up being myself, the bff, her bf and bachelor #3. We had a great time!! Since then, we've seen each other in more group get-togethers, but I have always viewed him as a friend. All of this changed on Wednesday night...

I got a text message from him, asking if I would like to go a party with him Saturday night.
I panicked, lol, and immediately closed that message and sent a text to the bff. Never got an answer!!!

So, left to figure this out solo, I agreed to go, thinking I would drive and if worse comes to worse, could leave if I wasn't having any fun.

Yesterday was just one of those days I knew was not going to be least not where my job was concerned! Since I still hadn't heard from the bff, I sent her an e-mail. In her reply, she was very excited to hear about this new development with Bachelor#3, and insisted that I say yes to him. Good thing I already did. We spent the majority of the day chatting over e-mail, disecting what this 'date' meant. According to her, and her bf, and the previous bachelor#2..none of which are supposed to be talking about's legit and bachelor#3 was really in to me.

Oh - well. This changes things. In between e-mails, I spent the rest of my time pretending to work, but really trying to figure out how I felt about all of this. Bachelor#3 is a really fun guy...he makes me laugh. I'm not a big fan of his hair, but we can change that later. He doesn't have a hairy face - big plus for him there. Hmm...maybe we could be more than buddies. Maybe, I'm a little excited about this new development.

So - now I have a weekend jammed packed with plans! Bachelor#3 is in a band, who has a show tonight, which we are now all going to. Saturday, we have our 'date' and then will meet up with the bff and her bf afterwards. I'm nervous about this 'date'. Ah!!


Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Just one of those mornings..

Having a bad day...and it's only 8:48am!!!
Started with somehow sleeping through my extremely obnoxious alarm to find myself waking up at 6:16am....16 minutes AFTER I'm supposed to be in my car, on my way to work. Excellent!
Got on the subway..which I know some people don't understand how or why, but I usually love taking it. Not this morning. Due to being late, it was a hell of a lot busier and people coughed, sneezed, yawned and stuck their armpits in my face. WTF people?? So rude!
Got to work, at 8:18am....18 minutes AFTER I start...even more excellent. Threw on some make up...normally I wouldn't even care, but one look in the bathroom mirror and I cringed...imagine what other people are going to think??
Made my oatmeal, and so far the only good thing today, met a very nice dude named Allan who is here from our Vancouver office. Chatted with him, returned to my desk with my oatmeal. Yummy :).
Took a sip of water...spilt it all down the front of my white blouse, which leaked through my white tank top, which has now revealed my purple bra. EXCELLENT!
Bah! Is it too late to decide to call in sick today??

Now that I have vented all of the horrendous drama that has occured in less than three hours, I realize it may seem minimal to some - but I have a downpacked routine every morning...when that routine goes south, so does my attitude. Doesn't help that the girls that I usually vent my frustrations to and laugh about afterwards aren't in the office today. Boo. Guess I am going to have to grin and bare it...let's just hope that the printer doesn't jam, or my stapler plays nice. Otherwise, it's D-Day for them!!

Monday, January 19, 2009

Lil' bits excited!

Although I have only been at my new job for just over two months, I am absolutely loving it and can't wait to learn as much as possible. It was frustrating for me in my first weeks here, as I had to depend on other people to help me get my work done. I made it my goal to practice, and learn to do this independently so that my account executives could depend on me, and feel comfortable with sending work directly to my inbox, as opposed to copying me in on an e-mail to one of my trainer's. Being new to this industry - the insurance industry - I know very little, especially when it comes to certain terminology, rules, etc. Browsing through our on-line employee portal, I came across a section entirely devoted to industry based training. I glanced through it, but didn't pay much attention, as I figured it wouldn't apply to me..I had only been there a month or so. A few weeks later, during my employee appraisal, I found out that I did not have to wait at all to further my education within the company. I immediately logged back on to the portal and read all the information provided for the LOMA courses. There are eight of them, and once (and if) I complete them all, I will have earned my FLMI. I enrolled for my first course - LOMA280 Principles of Insurance: Life, Health & Annuities. Sounds thrilling, I know - but I am so EXCITED! Who knew, Sarah Spiller, would ever EVER be excited about school! lol I know that this will take a lot of studying, and some serious will power on my part to get through the course info and pass my exam in May, but I can't wait to get started. With this course, I hope to pass in May and register for the next, eventually building my way all the way up to CEBS and moving my way up through the company.
I haven't worked out a ten year plan, but it's something I'm looking forward to working out. Heck, I'll be thrilled to have a 2 year plan.. ha ha ha. Wish me luck!!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Better than ever!

Having not been on my blog for quite some time, I took a quick read through past posts, and couldn't believe how sad and miserable I was. I deleted a few posts, although I know it's a no-no...but they were just too depressing. Thankfully, my first post of the New Year is on a positive note!

In November '08, I started a new job! I was extremely excited to be taking the next step in my adult life, as I somewhat felt that my previous job wasn't giving me enough responsibility, or sense of maturity. I worked in a home office, in a very relaxed atmosphere where part of my daily routine would be to browse through facebook, text message my friends and watch TV. I felt like I was still in high school, playing hooky. Most of all - it was boring! My new job keeps me busy and has my days flying past. I love the work that I am doing, the people in my office, and the general atmosphere here. I have only been here for two months, but received my first employee appraisal at the end of 2008. I was nervous going in to the meeting with my team leader and supervisor, as I had NEVER experienced something like this, and really did not know what to expect. Within minutes I let out the breath I hadn't realized was being held, and found out that my superiors were more than pleased with my addition to the team, and couldn't believe how well adapted I had become in such a short period of time. I was thrilled!! Today, as my probation is officially through by the end of the week, I signed up for my first industry-based training course. I am so excited to start learning more, and eventually have the possibility of moving up in the company. All of the opportunities and advantages that so many people are accustomed to, are brand new for me and I can't wait to get my hands on it all! Wish me luck :)

Outside of work, and because of it really, life in general has been excellent! I feel so much more at ease, and feel that my stress levels have decreased enormously. I'm finally becoming financially stable, which since I have been working full time from the age of 19, is quite overdue. This alone took away probably 50% of what I usually stressed out about. It's amazing how much better you feel, when you know things are taken care of. My biggest worry is gone. I can't necessarily be carefree, but I'm comfortable, and that's the best I can ask for right now. I bought a new car, which was very exciting for me, and literally will drive anywhere you ask me to. It's been so much fun. I've reconnected with my friends, spending more time with those I had lost touch with, and making new ones along the way. I've lost relationships with some great people along this long road too, and it still makes me sad to think of how things could have turned out in some situations...but...I don't want to dwell on the past anymore. What is done, is done, and I only have good thoughts for 2009. I have been telling myself that I am going to lose weight for almost 2 years now, yet never stuck to a strict regime, or put any real effort in. With my new job, came a new sense of myself, and I'm glad to say I've finally worked out a schedule that works for me and is helping me achieve long overdue goals.

The title of this post explains it all - things are better than ever, and I couldn't be happier.
Happy 2009 everyone! I hope the year is as good for you as I am planning mine to be!!